the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Someone signed my nipple.
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