I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
