ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
