tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
