My brain says no but my pants say off.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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