that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
