I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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