Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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