her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
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