Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
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