its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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