Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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