chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
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