Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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