The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Randomize