Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
No more Irish car bombs ever.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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