We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I wear drunk well.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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