so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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