I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize