Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Randomize
