I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
