She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
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