I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
