theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Randomize
