so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Randomize
