belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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