I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
