Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
