just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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