It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
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