why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
