He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
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