quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
