Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
