You work out of a Hotel?
If that was your dad, he is hot
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
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