is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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