i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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