Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Randomize
