Are we in a gay sports bar?
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
Randomize
