I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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