i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
No more Irish car bombs ever.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
