My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
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