I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
