I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
When are your genitals available?
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize