I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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