Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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