Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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