Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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