They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
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