Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize