so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
